If time supposedly "heals all wounds," then why, after all this time, does it hurt almost worse than it did then? Why haven't all of these years healed the wounds on my heart and soul? Is it because they can't be healed, only scabbed over, and when something comes along to trigger those emotions it's like picking off a scab and making the wound worse? Or do they actually scar and then get torn open again, simply making the wounds and scars deeper? I don't understand. I shouldn't be feeling this way after all this time if what they say is true and time really does ease the pain. Personally, I think that saying was created by people who were so terrified of their own pain, sorrow and hatred that they had to find a way to convince themselves that it would be eased and "healed" if they just ignored it long enough. Cowards, essentially. I have no fear of my own pain, hatred or sorrow. Some people would even say I thrive on it, and who am I to disagree? They're probably right. The darkness is where I find the most comfort, not only because it's familiar to me, but because it is the one place (or frame of mind, perhaps?) where I can simply be myself without being judged, where I can feel the pain and hatred and sorrow and no one tries to tell me I'm wrong. And I won't even bring "God" into it because anyone reading this knows my beliefs, or lack thereof well enough that I don't think I need to reiterate that point right now. It's all a load of bullshit.
"Can you ever kill the pain in my heart, even though they say angels don't kill?"
I think the notion of "time heals all wounds" is bullshit too. I don't think ignoring it for a long time will make it go away or make the pain any less agonising. It will still be there. I do believe, however, that love can help soothe those types of wounds. Sure they will always be there and will always hurt but love itself, something so beautiful and unconditional can do wonders for a broken soul.
ReplyDelete"I've learned that...love, not time, heals all wounds" - Andy Rooney