The panic attacks are getting even more out of control. I'm not entirely sure what to do anymore. I woke up freaking out this morning for no reason at all. I don't even remember having a bad dream or anything. I took my anti-anxiety pill like I'm supposed to and it calmed me down a little, but it's starting to wear off now and I'm feeling extremely high strung. Maybe the holidays are stressing me out, I don't know. There's so much going on around me right now and sometimes I get so stressed and anxious that I just want to puke. I can't wait until Friday when I can go buy another bottle of whiskey and a bottle of vodka and probably a bottle of Kahlua too. Black and/or White Russians ftw. Maybe I'll get a couple of bottles of red wine too, why the fuck not? The iPod is on shuffle, playing a list of Children of Bodom, Nightwish and Sonata Arctica in a completely random order. It's pretty awesome to not know what to expect next since I know all of these albums by heart. Keeps thing exciting.
Deep breaths...8 hours and I can go home, have a beer, and try to relax. Deep, slow breaths...
...I am losing my mind. Not that there was much left to lose...
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I hope that the alcohol will help with this panic attacks. I wish there was more I could do to help. It's such a shame that the wormwood absinthe is illegal in the US. I'm sure it would be very helpful right about now.
ReplyDelete*hugs*